


i never learned to say what my heart yearns today

by melvs



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Main Video Game Series), Pocket Monsters | Pokemon - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst, Drama, Friendship, M/M, Romance, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-14
Updated: 2017-09-15
Packaged: 2018-10-03 03:28:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 16,639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10234847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melvs/pseuds/melvs
Summary: Born without a voice, Red finds it both difficult and cruel to put his soulmate through so much pain.-Or the Soulmate AU where Red is mute & is unable to say anything to let Green know that they're soulmates.





	1. saying nothing at all

**Author's Note:**

> Three chapter soulmate AU that begins with Red's POV, then Green's POV and ends with an epilogue.
> 
> I altered some details that differ from the game/anime. I'm aware that in the game/anime, once they turn 10 they're able to begin their Pokemon journey. However, I changed the age minimum to 13 for plot purposes. (And also because I did not feel comfortable writing 10 yr olds talking about love and shit.)
> 
> So I **_love_** soulmate au fics. But when I saw that there are hardly any soulmate au fics revolving my favorite Pokemon ships (Originalshipping  & Palletshipping), I decided to write my own involving these two. I had been stalling for 2 months to post this until I had like 90% of the entire fic completed. That way I don't get a horrible writer's block, or get too distracted by life, after posting the first chapter & leave people hanging for several months for an update. *casually refers to the other fic I've neglected to work on*. SO I'm excited to finally be sharing this. Praying that whoever reads this enjoys it. :)
> 
>  **WARNING:** there's a suicide attempt reference towards the end of this chapter.
> 
> *also to avoid confusion:  
> \- **bold** & _italicized_ words are **_soul marks_**  
>  \- _italicized_ words are thoughts from the person's POV

Sometimes Red would find himself wondering how life would have been if he had the ability to speak.

Or let alone form a single syllable.

He would want to know how he would sound like if he could speak.

Or how loud he could get if he screamed.

He probably would've been able to sing his favorite song.

Or read his favorite book… Out loud.

Or tell his favorite person in the world how he felt about them.

How he felt about _him_.

Though Red wouldn't have to say anything directly to him. Red would easily whisper little sweet confessions to the wind and watch those words magically write themselves on the skin of his beloved.

Because that's how Red's mother explained how soulmates worked.

Red was five when he noticed words on his forearm that were written in sloppy handwriting that wasn't his own. And he was confused as to how someone could've been able to get close enough to him to write something on his arm without him noticing. Curious, and a bit freaked out, he ran to his mother for answers.

"Ah. I see your soulmate is already wondering about you." his mother observed the words engraved on his skin.

According to her brief lecture, everyone seems to have a soulmate; someone who, the universe decides, is best fitted to fall in love with. And whenever one’s soulmate speaks of the other, their words are temporarily written, in their handwriting, across one’s forearm before disappearing into the depths of the person's heart.

Going to bed that night, Red stared at his blank forearm and wondered who his soulmate was.

Were they good looking or were they nice?

Did they like to play outside or dance around?

Has he already met them? He doubted it.

Pallet Town was too small of a town and there were hardly any kids roughly around the same age as Red who he'd met.

Come to think about it, he hasn't been able to meet any other kids… at all.

Considering that Red lives on a long dirt road that stretches out from the main road of Pallet Town, that only houses his own and an enormous house at the end - which is owned by an important man according to Red’s mom.

And since he doesn't start school for another month, Red is gonna have to be patient about meeting other kids and possibly his soulmate.

But he has patience.

So he waits.

* * *

Two months after starting school, and Red already made a new friend.

Since starting school, Red was extremely shy and distant from all the other kids in his class. Never making any friends, or meeting any other kids, Red wondered how he would be able to if he couldn't be able to speak. Then he became paranoid that others would think he's weird and start avoiding him.

Until one day during recess, when Red was alone in the sandbox, busy building a sandcastle, he was approached by a girl. The brown haired girl sat across from him and watched as he was building his castle. He thought that if he ignored her, she would bored herself and leave. But she remained glued to her spot and patiently watched him. Then when he was finished with his castle, she spoke.

"Can I build one too?"

Startled that she talked, nevertheless spoke to him, he slowly nodded and handed her the plastic toy shovel he was using for the castle.

Now it was his turn to watch as she build her castle.

At the end of recess, there were two lopsided sandcastles standing next to each other belonging to two freshly new friends.

* * *

"Red! Red!"

Leaf shouted his name when he entered the classroom. It’s been a month since they've been friends and they've basically been inseparable since. Being tackled into a hug, Red hugged her briefly before she pulled back and shoved her arm into his face.

"Look! My soulmate… They're talking about me!"

Leaning back to get a better look, Red saw the words written across her arm.

"I wonder who they are. Have I met them? Maybe it's someone here.." Leaf dropped to a low whisper before turning around and glancing over the small class of ten kids before returning to happily smile at Red and gush about all the possibilities on who it could be.

Red smiled at Leaf for being excited about her first words from her soulmate, but deep down he felt disappointed.

Somewhat sad.

Since meeting Leaf, Red thought, and sometimes hoped, that maybe Leaf would turn out to be his soulmate. That one day he would catch her saying something sweet about him and then, later on, watch those words appear on his arm. But since meeting Leaf, he hasn't had any words appear on his arm.

After the first words appeared on his own skin, it continued on for a while before stopping right before he started school. And Red was pretty certain Leaf has at least said something sweet about Red to his face before, however her words never reflected on his arm.

He remained hopeful and thought that maybe it was a soul bond flaw of some sort. But today just proved that Leaf can't be his soulmate. Since he never said the words that are written on her arm.

Because he doesn't have a voice to say the words that are written on her arm.

So for now Red smiles for Leaf and he waits again.

* * *

"Red, honey."

Red came running down the stairs and into the kitchen after hearing his mother calling for him.

"Red. Go put on your shoes and change your shirt."

She pointed at a dirty spot that he must've gotten when he was outside earlier.

"We're going to Professor Oak's house to meet his grandson. He’s new here and is going to start living with his grandfather."

Nodding, Red ran back upstairs for a freshly clean shirt and his best pair of shoes.

Professor Oak is a famous Pokémon researcher that lives at the giant house down the end of the road. Basically, they're neighbors and Red sometimes wondered why someone as famous as Oak would want to live in a small town like Pallet Town, nevertheless on a dirt road surrounded by nothing.

He thought that since Pallet is small and quiet, the professor must've liked that.

Once arriving at Professor's Oak house, Red mother's rang the doorbell once and they patiently waited for an answer. Not having to wait too long, the Professor opened the door and invited them both in.

Having been at the Professor's house a few times before, for some friendly neighbor chat between the Professor and Red's mother, Red was still amazed to how big and spacious the house was. From the outside, the house already looked enormous but on the inside, it seemed even more bigger and beautiful. The floors were of polished marble, the interior had a modern, sophisticated look and he could tell that he had enough rooms to house half of Pallet.

While the adults talked, Red wandered around the living room just taking everything in and awing at the antiques that the Professor owned. Since the Professor did work with Pokémon, there was a lab in the back of the house where he worked with the Pokémon but Red wasn't allowed to go there, since he was still a bit too young.

After wandering around the living room, he moved on the study room that was down the hall, next to a bathroom, and started looking around.

"HEY. You can't be in here!"

Red jumped a little to a voice that came from behind him and turned around quickly to find a boy, that looked the same age as Red, standing at the doorway.

The brown-spiky haired boy, who had the most crystal clear emerald eyes, glared straight at Red before walking up to him, grabbing him by the wrist and dragging him out the room.

"That's gramps study and no one is allowed in there! Especially to little kids like you!" the brown haired boy snarled as he dragged Red down the hall and back into the living room where the two adults have been talking since they arrived.

"Ah Green, I see you already met Red." Professor Oak stated when he saw the two boys enter the living room.

"I found him snooping around your study, Gramps." the brown haired boy, Green, quipped before letting go of Red's wrist, who noticed that they were basically holding hands.

"Oh it's okay Green. I actually invited Red and his mother over so I can introduce you to them properly." Oak stated before introducing Red mother's to Green.

"It's nice to meet you dear." Red's mother shook Green's hand.

"Nice to meet you too, ma'm." Green said. "Well, I'll be upstairs in my room Gramps."

"Okay. Oh, why don't you take Red with you and show him your room. His mother and I are going to be in the kitchen talking." Professor smiled.

"What?! No! I hardly know him! Why would I want to take him to my room?" Green pointed at Red.

Red stared at Green wondering why the brown haired boy was sounding so mean towards him when they just met.

"Green, please. Don't be rude in front of our guests." the Professor scolded. "Just show him your room. Get to know each other."

Green feeling defeated, he rolled his eyes and turn around to head for the stairs.

Red watched him stomped his way up the stairs before stopping halfway, turned around and glared him.

"Well? Aren't you coming up? I don't have all day!" Green growled.

Not wanting to keep Green waiting, or upset him even more, Red quickly followed him up the stairs, around the corner and all the way down the hall to the last room on the left.

"Don't touch anything cause I know you'll end up breaking it." Green proclaimed as he was closing the door behind them.

Red was too busy looking around the room that he almost didn't listen to what Green was telling him. Walking around, Red observed all the different kinds of toys that were scattered around the room and the many books that Green seemed to own. As Red started reaching for a toy, he was yanked backwards by his wrist.

"I told you not to touch anything!" Green shouted.

Wanting to shout back, Red slightly opened his mouth until he remembered that he couldn't shout anything back, even he could, so he just closed his mouth again. Green noticed this and prepared himself for a shouting match, but he was surprised when he saw that Red decided to back down and just glared at him.

"What? Don't have anything to say?" Green smirk.

Red just turned away and focused his sight on something else other than Green. Green noticing the tension in between them, calmed down a bit and approached Red.

"Listen, I never had anyone else in my room before. So I guess you can play with some toys." Green said.

Red looked back at Green before nodding and reached for a plush toy that was laying on the floor right next to him. Green trying remain calm and not freak out by having another kid touch his things decided to distract himself by trying to talk.

"So your name is Red?"

Red nodded as he was playing with a Charmander plush toy.

"That's cool. I thought I was the only kid named after a crayon." Green said.

Red just stared at him for a bit before turning his attention back to the plush toy.

"Hey, why don't you talk? Am I too lame for you or what?" Green snarled.

Red stopped playing with the plush toy and froze for few seconds before staring at Green. He then tried to gesture using his hands saying how he can't speak.

"Oh you can't talk? At all?"

Red shook his head.

"Oh, well that's new."

Red shrugged before turning his attention back to green.

"You're still lame either way." Green grunted before picking up a toy and going to the opposite side of the room to play by himself.

Red, not caring what Green said, just focus on the toy he was playing with until his mom came up to the room, with the Professor, and bid farewell to the both of them.

That night, after taking a bath, Red's mother noticed writing on Red's arm as she was drying him with a towel.

"Look honey. Your soul mate must've been talking about you."

Looking at the arm where his mother was pointing at, Red's stared at the writing in shock.

In crooked, sloppy writing he saw the words: **_You're still lame_ **.

"Though I don't think it's very nice of them to say." his mom said. "Do you know who they are?"

Red just stood there staring at his arm too shock to respond.

"Well honey, I bet they didn't mean it. Don't let it get to you. Come on, let's put you on some warm clothes before you catch a cold."

That night Red rubbed his blank forearm and thought about the words that were written there just awhile ago. He remembered how Green had said the exact same thing to him earlier in the day.

Red then started wondering if Green was his soulmate. But then he remembered how mean Green was towards him. Today was the first time they met but the other boy was cruel.

He didn't want a soulmate like Green who was mean and bitter and loud.

Red wanted a soulmate like Leaf who was kind and friendly and smart.

He can't have a soulmate like Green.

He doesn't want a soulmate like Green.

So Red went to sleep that night declaring how Green can't be his, and hopefully it's true.

He would rather wait his entire life until his real soulmate pops up.

* * *

The next morning, someone was knocking at the door and Red answered it to Green standing outside.

"Hey."

Red just stared at Green, confused.

_Why are you here?_

Red thought Green hated him. Isn't that why Green was being mean to him yesterday?

"I-" Green cleared his throat. "I wanted to know if you wanted to play today?"

Red continued to stare at Green before slowly nodding.

Putting on his shoes and letting his mom know where he's going to be, he runs outside with Green and spends the entire afternoon playing until Green decides to go back home for the day.

"That was fun. See you later, weirdo." Green smirked before turning around to walk back home.

That night, Red stared at the new words that appeared on his arm: **_Weirdo_ ** _._

Now, Red was certain that Green was his soulmate.

But he still didn't want Green as a soulmate.

Even though they played today, and actually enjoyed it, Green still made snarky comments and sometimes was a bit rough on Red. Not wanting to think about it anymore, Red decided to let sleep take him away and hoped for a better soulmate.

But after that day, Green made it a habit to come by Red's house everyday to play with him. Sometimes they would play at Green's house, specifically in Green's room since Professor Oak didn't want two kids running around the house breaking things.

Finally after the first week of Green settling in in his new home, his grandfather took him to his first day of school.

"Red!" Green shouted when he spotted Red in the class.

Red stared at Green wondering why he was here.

"Gramps finally put me in school and this is my class. I guess we're classmates now." Green said.

Taking a seat next to Red, Green began talking to him how the class looked small and boring. Red simply rolled his eyes to every of Green's comments. Later in recess, that's where Red introduced Green to Leaf.

"Hi, I'm Leaf." Leaf waved to Green.

"Hey, I'm Green."

They talked to each other for awhile before deciding to go to the sandbox, to build a couple of sandcastles, before they had to go back inside for lunch. After that day, the three become close friends and spend all their time together during school.

Outside of school, Green continued going to Red's house to spend time together. Occasionally, Leaf would have her parents bring her over to play, since she lived in a different part Pallet Town and couldn't walk on her own. This routine went on for years until Red turned twelve, a few months after Green did.

And in those years, Red grew fond of Green. He actually considered Green to be his best friend, besides Leaf, and managed to see why Green could be his soulmate. Green may be mean and rude but deep down, he was a decent person. Sometimes, Red would notice Green show a different, softer side of himself before reverting back to his snarky persona. Green, along with Leaf, also went through the struggle of learning some sign language to better communicate with Red.

So after a while, Red considered telling Green how they were soulmates and how Red truly felt about him. And he hoped that Green felt the same way towards him. One night, when Red was sleeping over at Green's house, they somehow started talking about their soulmates.

"I wonder why my soulmate hasn't talked about me yet." Green blurted out randomly.

Red turned his head towards Green and stared at him before realizing what he meant.

"I haven't had any words written on my arm yet and it's starting to get to me. I mean, Leaf is constantly showing her words to us and I get so mad that my soulmate hasn't said anything about me"

Looking away, Red suddenly felt guilty.

Guilty that he was causing Green to be upset for not saying anything about him and having those words write themselves on Green's skin.

Guilty for not being able to say anything to reassure Green that he does want to talk about him and he's constantly on his mind.

Guilty for probably making Green think that his soulmate doesn't want anything to do with him.

Wanting to ease the ache a bit, Red jumps out of the bed, dashes towards Green's desk across the room, snatches a pen and returns to the bed. Green watches as Red uncaps the pen, grabs his arm and starts writing on his skin. A minute later, after Red finishes writing a few words in his best handwriting, he watches Green look at the his writing and sees a light shade of pink spread across Green's face.

" ** _You're cool_ ** _._ **_Awesome_ ** _._ **_Most Amazing Best Friend Ever_ **. Wow, Red. Thanks. This means a lot." Green smiles after reading the few words Red wrote on his arm.

Warmth spreads throughout Red's chest and he thinks he's ready. To confess to Green that, maybe, Red thinks of Green as more of a friend. Yes, they may be too young right now to understand how soulmates work but Red would hope that when they're older they could figure what they want to be, together. For now, he treasures their friendship but hopefully it evolves into something more meaningful. He has all the patience in the world for that meaningful stage, just as long as he has Green by his side. But before he could confess anything, Green interrupts him.

"I wonder who she may be. I bet she's pretty. She has to be if she wants to date me." Green smirks.

Red looking at him puzzled, he then signs to him asking about who he's talking about.

"My soulmate, of course. I wonder who she is."

Struck with confusion, Red then signs to him about the possibility of being a boy.

Green coughed before half shouting.

"No! My soulmate has to be a girl. That's what my grandpa told me."

Red looked at Green shocked and dishearten to his claim.

Green expects his soulmate to be a girl…

Not a boy…

Like Red.

Feeling a bit emotional, Red lets Green know that he's going to sleep and turns away. After this revelation, Red now knows that Green can't be his even if Red does wants Green to be his. The next day, Red returns home and spends the entire day sulking in his room. He manages to avoid Green for a few days, claiming that he's sick, until Green persuades him to sleep over again. They were both laying down on Green's floor, in his room, staring up at the ceiling and just talking about their future.

"Gramps said that once we turn thirteen, we can finally go on our Pokémon journey!" Green proclaimed.

Red just continued staring up at the ceiling and made small constant movements to let Green that he was listening.

"I'm going to be the best Pokémon trainer and later on, I'll become the Pokémon Champion!" Green shouted. "And maybe that'll catch my soulmate's attention."

Red, still a little sad about the other night, just nods.

But then he realizes something.

If Green thinks that becoming Champion will get his soulmate's attention, then maybe if Red becomes champion himself, he'll have Green attention and Green will have to acknowledge each other as soulmates.

And Red doesn’t care what society, or anyone around them, has to say about the fact that they’re both boys. The universe fated both of them with each other and Red’s heart yearns for Green’s love. He’ll fight with fire, risk burns along the battle, just to keep Green by his side and ultimately win his love.

Determined, Red declares from that night on that his only goal is to become Pokémon Champion to secure Green's heart as his own.

Patience and hard work will get him there.

He just has to wait until he turns thirteen.

* * *

Once turning thirteen, Red felt like his life had drastically changed.

Not only did he embarked on his Pokémon journey alone with Pikachu, his starter Pokémon he got from Professor Oak, but he started it with a broken heart.

A few months before he had planned to start his adventure, Green suddenly started avoiding him and ignoring him. When Red confronted Green about it, he was shocked to how cruel his best friend turned towards him.

"It's not like we were going to do this together. Are you an idiot? Don't you get it? If we're both aiming for the same title, that makes us rivals. Later, loser."

That same night, Red hardly got any sleep with _**idiot**_ and  ** _loser_ ** marked on his arm.

He didn't understand why Green would abandon him.

Did he do something wrong?

Doesn't matter, because if becoming Champion is the only way for Green to notice him now, then he'll beat his (ex?) best friend to the title.

Since beginning his journey, Red has dedicated his time and effort on training with his Pokémon for them to reached their highest potential. With each gym they come across, and each gym badge they win, Red didn't fail to notice how strong his team of Pokémon, who he's gradually come to love and respect, had grown. He also came to realize the amount of trust they have towards one another.

Though Red was growing friendships with his Pokemon, he was also in the process of losing a friendship with someone else. Throughout the journey, Red had ran into Green on multiple occasions. With each encounter, each battle, and each win against Green, Red could see their relationship slowly wither. Before they had started their journeys, there was hope for their friendship to survive this race to the title. But now, Red could see that survival being a desperate wish instead of being reality. Each encounter invited a darker shade of Green. Each darker shade displayed an angrier side of Green that Red never knew existed. Red tried his best to ignore the sting his heart dealt with whenever Green released his frustration on him. But it got harder and harder to do so with each passing battle. However Red still kept faith that he can help save their friendship and gain something else, so he kept moving forward keeping in mind that Green will care about him the way Red cares about Green.

And after a year, since starting his Pokémon adventure, when Red earns his eighth and final gym badge, the realization sinks in that maybe he can become Pokémon Champion and therefore use the position to have Green's attention again.

To have Green's friendship back.

And most importantly, to have his soulmate.

And once he defeats the last of the Elite Four, Red starts to believe that maybe he can get Green back as he makes his way towards the Champion's quarters. But once he pushes through the doors that lead to the Champion's chamber, his heart sinks.

At first, when he opens the doors, he's blinded by bright white lights that flood the room and assaults his vision. Shutting his eyes and looking away to let his vision calm down from the attack of the brightness, he slowly begins opening his eyes to where he's squinting and allows his eyes to adjust to the room. He spots a figure on the opposite of the room but he can't make out the features or the face of the person. Red doesn't have to wait until his vision clears to see who the person is. He doesn't have a chance to see the person's face before the person decides to speak.

"Red."

 _That voice_.

"Took you awhile."

That same voice that Red had grown to treasure and hate at the same time.

"Looks like I got here before you."

The same voice that once brought Red comfort and clarity, but now flinched in defense expecting a tirade of anger.

"Taking down the Champion was pretty easy, if I say so myself."

The same voice who belongs to someone so special towards Red, or used to but this is why he's here. To make that person realize how special he is to Red. Their fates are entwined with one another and Red wants him to see that. That no matter the opposing challenges that pushes them apart, there's a greater force that's keeping them connected by heart.

"And defending my title against you will be even easier."

Red just never expected one of those challenges to be his soulmate, of all people. The same person who Red has been so determined on winning back by winning this title.

But can Red manage to steal the title from his beloved?

Who has also worked hard on reaching the same dream.

"I, Green, am the Pokémon League Champion and I won't lose to a loser like you!"

This will probably be the biggest obstacle they'll have to go through so they can finally be together.

Like they're meant to be.

Because their stories are written like that.

Just like how Green's words are written on Red's arm.

How Green's words would bring Red comfort but sadness during his journey up until this moment. The way Red could see the words reflect the kind of anger that Green would say about Red, even when they were miles apart. Or sometimes, Red could feel the sadness seeping through the words whenever he caught glimpse of them.

He's tired of causing Green so much pain, but now he wants to make it right.

He wants to do this right.

But how can he?

Well twenty minutes later and Red knows he fucked up.

He won the title but he lost something much more.

He wants to run up to Green, and comfort him with hugs and sweet tiny kisses but he's frozen. So frozen that he watches his beloved get up off the floor, where he fell apart in a sobbing mess after the battle, and ran out the door, in defeat.

He's unfrozen when he feels a hand on his shoulder and turns around so fast hoping it's Green, who's returned and willing to restart their friendship, but is disappointed to find the Professor smiling down on him. After several congratulatory praises and getting inducted to the Pokémon League Hall of Fame, all Red wants to do is find Green and confront him.

Why did he run away?

Red thought that winning the title would finally make Green acknowledge him.

Was it because he stole the title from Green?

Well, he only did it because of Green.

Because of the kind of future he thought the title would promise if he had won it.

Red needs answers.

He didn't get much answers once he found Green.

Returning back to Pallet, Red found Green crouched in a fetal position deep within the farthest corners of his bedroom. Upon entering, Red could hearing the faint sounds of sobbing through the dark and mild curses that pierced through the room. Keeping the lights off but making his presence known to Green, Red is knocked back by a fist to his jaw and a rant of profanity afterwards.

"So are you happy now?!"

_Why would I be? I did it for you. For us._

Red tried signing but he realized the room was probably too dark for Green to see.

"Satisfied by beating me yet again and stealing my dream away from me?!"

_I’m your soulmate. Green._

For once, Red tried screaming the words but nothing came out.

_I love you Green! I LOVE YOU._

Red tried scrambling to his feet to flick on the light switch, however Green pushed him back onto the floor.

"Well you can fuck off now. I don't want anything to do with you."

_Wait... What?_

_"_ I hate you. I fucking HATE you."

_But…_

"GET THE FUCK OUT."

And Red disappeared that night.

Disappeared from Green's room.

Disappeared from Pallet Town.

Disappeared from the Pokémon League.

Red was gone.

* * *

Even at the highest peak, away from society, Red can't escape.

Risking his life, and his team of Pokémon, he climbed this snowy mountain to the top to search for solitude and a place to sort out his broken heart.

And once he found it, he made it his home.

His new home, away from everyone.

Alone.

The way it should be for him.

But it still isn't enough.

The first few days, after Red ran off, he cried and cried and cried. Green's words burned in his skin for hours but haunted his dreams for nights. For days, weeks, even months, Red would find new words written on his arm.

 **_Fuck you_ ** _._

 **_I hate you_ ** _._

 **_I wish I never had met you_ ** _._

New words but with the same message: Green didn't love Red.

He wondered why he even bothered going through all that trouble if becoming Champion didn't guaranteed Green's love. Maybe if he never had gone after the title, he would have had Green by his side. But it doesn't matter now because he ended up alone.

And Red doesn't know how much time passed. He lost count after 2 weeks, since keeping tracks of days, and nights, on top of the mountain seemed impossible with the weather always shrouding the sky with thick dark clouds.

Overtime, the words on Red's arm become less frequent until a point where they completely stop appearing. And after a long stretch of time of not seeing a single word, Red finally concluded that Green's forgotten about him. Even though Red wants to believe that it's for the best, something inside his chest break and he feels his heart harden cold like the mountain.

Void from any emotion, he decides to move on and forget about everything.

About his old life.

About his family and friends.

About Green.

He stops looking at his arm.

Red stays on top of the mountain just training his Pokémon.

Until a trainer manages to find him and asks for a battle.

Never one to refuse, he accepts.

He loses.

And then he's left with nothing.

Not knowing what to do now, he thinks and thinks.

He doesn't have anyone or anything left for him.

One day, his curiosity makes me wander to the edge of the mountain.

He's always wanted to know how it’d feel to fly and just let it all go.

The memories.

The loneliness.

The pain.

Maybe this is his next step.

Just one step away.

From the corner of his eye he sees black writing appear, for the first time in a long time, on his forearm but he ignores it.

His heart can’t take anymore insults.

He closes his eyes.

Takes a breath.

Smiles.

 _Green. I lo-_.

But before he could think about anything, he's yanked back harshly and thrown to the ground. The air in his lungs is knocked out and his vision blurs for a second before trying to refocus his sight on the figure in front of him. Panicking that he's being attacked by a wild Pokémon, he reaches for a pokeball from his belt but remembers that he left all his Pokémon in the cave.

Then he notices the figure lunge at him and he looks away expecting claws or teeth to tear into his flesh. But instead, he feels the Pokémon latch itself to Red. And then he feels something warm dripping on his neck and soaking through his shirt. And the Pokémon seems to be making some… choking sound?

Confused, he turns towards the figure but he's blinded by brown fur. Leaning back, he notices it's actually brown spiky hair that belongs to a guy. And that guy is currently hugging him tight while crying onto his neck.

"You idiot." the guy whispers in his neck.

"You fucking idiot."

And after saying that, the guy looks up to Red and stares at him with large streams of tears rolling down his cheeks. Red realizes for the first time in ages how he misses the large clear emerald eyes he had come to love. Even though they're currently clouded with a deep shade of red and a flood of incoming tears, he still thinks they're the most beautiful set of eyes on this planet.

"Were you going to jump?"

Red is too stunned to respond.

"WERE YOU?"

The shout snaps Red out from his shock and looks away, too ashamed to answer.

"Why? Why would you leave me like that?"

Upon hearing that, Red looks back at the brown haired guy.

"Why would you leave me here alone?"

Red just stares at him in confusion, not understanding how he would leave him here alone.

Why would he care?

Doesn't he hate Red?

"I know, Red."

_What?_

“I know that we’re soulmates...”

Oh.

"I love you, Red."

 _Oh_.

And then lips crash onto another set of lips.

Warm soft lips mending with cold chapped lips.

Red is shocked at first but he realizes what's happening and kisses back. His thoughts are racing everywhere because the person he loves is finally here and on top of that, he’s kissing him. And they spend a long moment in the cold fierce weather lost in a long heated kiss wishing that they didn’t have to break apart, wanting to spend all eternity channeling their love towards one another with this one kiss. But eventually, they pull away for air and emerald eyes lost themselves in the fiery red flames of ruby eyes, while ruby eyes lost themselves in the deep sea of trees of emerald eyes.

"Let's go home."

Red nods with tears in his eyes for the first time in a long time.

His hands are entwined with the one he loves.

He doesn't have to wait anymore.

_I love you too, Green._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading. :) hope y'all enjoyed it.
> 
> The next chapter is written from Green's POV.


	2. saying all the wrong things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Green doesn't seem to realize that his world revolved around the one person he had pushed away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay. Spring break was distracting & life was nerve-wracking. 
> 
> Also sorry for the looooooooong chapter. It got deeper than intended. 
> 
> Please enjoy tho :)

Sometimes Green would find himself wondering what it would be like find words written across his forearm.

Well actually, he wondered all the time.

It stressed Green out.

Day and night he wondered why his soulmate wouldn’t spare a second to talk about him. He's handsome, intelligent, has a great personality (not really) and well known - or he thought. Obviously his grandfather, Professor Oak, is famous for being a top Pokemon researcher. Therefore, people should know about Green’s existence as Professor Oak’s grandson - and soon to be Pokemon Champion. And if not, then people are idiots.

Jealousy boiled through Green’s veins whenever other people showed off their soulmate's words. He would spend hours just glaring at his arm hoping that, somehow, his soulmate would sense his frustration and finally say something, at least one word, to let Green know that they exist - somewhere on this planet.

But it's already been so long. He's already twelve, about to start his Pokémon journey, and he's starting to think that maybe he just simply doesn't have a soulmate.

Frustrated and desperate for answers, about the lack of connection from his soulmate, Green caved and went to his grandfather for an explanation.

“Oh Green, don’t worry. Sometimes connections with one’s soulmates takes time to establish with one another.” his grandfather reassured Green.

“But Gramps, I’m already 12. I can’t wait any longer.” Green whined.

“Green. Just have patience with her.”

_Her?_

"I bet she'll be a lovely girl when you finally find her."

Those words stunned him.

Though he doesn’t know why.

His grandfather expects his soulmate to be a girl, it’s only natural. However whenever Green tries to imagine how his soulmate might look like, the face of his childhood friend always crosses his mind. And each time it happens, it confuses Green.

Why would he be picturing his best friend?

Yes, Green could say that he’s close with Red - since Red was there from the beginning - but that doesn’t explain why Red being his soulmate makes more sense than it being someone else.

It could be because Red has always been there for Green.

After all, Red was his first real friend.

Since moving with his grandfather, Green was alone. Though it wasn’t on purpose but by choice. Abandoned by his parents, Green didn’t bother getting close with anyone. He did see his grandfather making an effort to communicate with Green, but he was too hesitate to reach out. However, that all changed when he met Red. Red was the first person he was able to connect with and carry on a friendship with.

Upon meeting Red, his inability to speak was sort of a surprise. Never meeting anyone with that kind of disability before - actually never meeting anyone else in general before - Green thought he wasn’t going to get along with the crimson eyed kid. Yet some impulse sparked inside Green that made him want to reach out towards the silent boy. Starting off as a cautious friendship, it soon bloomed into a strong friendship.

This friendship led to years of summers spent relaxing by the huge lake near their houses, Autumns concentrated on carving pumpkins together and staying up late telling scary stories (mainly told by Green), Winters bundled in layers of winter coats and countless snowball fights, and Springs wasted running through the endless field that was basically considered Green’s grandfather’s backyard.

And with time, Green slowly started seeing Red at a different light. These feelings of comfort and admiration would flush Green and it scared him, because Red was his friend. Whenever Red would look at Green or touch him, even if it was for a second, Green would become overwhelmed with warmth.

Green would try denying it. That these frustrating feelings towards Red were nothing but emotions fueled by the lack of acknowledgement from his soulmate and years of sharing a tight friendship. But something deep inside Green's heart struggled to tell him that it's way beyond something as simple as that. That this feeling he got just by the thought of Red is more than just a friendship. A friendship Green has treasured, and sometimes taken granted for, since he met Red and he’ll be forever grateful for years of happiness.

Though now, he doesn’t know if that friendship will still exist after this journey. Aside from the confusing feelings towards Red, they were about to start on a journey - or race - to the Champion title and this is one thing that they won’t be able to do together. After all, Green is doing this to find his soulmate - the person he’s destined to spend the rest of his life with. While Red is doing this to be the very best, which Green assumes is Red’s intention. They share the same goal but for different reasons on why they’re trying to achieve it. So to make things easy for both of them, and put some space between them, Green pushed Red away.

And that same night, after pushing Red away, Green was unable to sleep. The words he said to Red kept replaying in his mind over and over and they wouldn’t stop. He thought putting Red at a distance would help ease the thoughts in his head, however the words he said didn’t feel right and his heart ached with the thought of Red not being there anymore.  He felt like rewinding time, stop himself from saying the words and find another way to keep Red out of his mind without having to lose him.

So instead of clarity, the uneasiness inside Green just grew more.

In a few months, both their lives were going to change.

A change in both their lives that was inevitable.

Whether it was now or later, they were going to go their separate ways.

It had to be that way.

But did it really have to be that way?

_Yes, it does. I’ll beat Red and find my soulmate. I can do this._

* * *

_Fuck. Not again. I can’t do this._

Green wanted to scream every profanity that crossed his mind as he recalled his defeated Eevee back into it’s Pokeball. He thought for sure that he had this battle in the palm of his hands but he was wrong.

Wrong again.

Wrong like today.

Wrong like last week.

Wrong like last month.

Somehow, Green is always wrong.

He trains his Pokemon so hard and pushes them to do their best so they can reach their true potential. Day and night spent training harder than the day before with dedication to grow stronger and faster. Determination fueled even more by noting all the grown progress by each Pokemon, which leads to more time to train and train and train. Yet that isn’t enough to beat the one person that he somehow started to despise losing to.

Green was always one or two gym badges ahead, but Red was always more experienced when it came to battling. And learning that with each defeat against Red, it pissed Green off. Though each defeat just motivated Green into working harder in training his Pokemon, it didn’t matter because he knew that the next time he ran into Red he’d lose again.

And with each loss, Green could see his chance of winning the title slowly decreasing. That future of being Champion started looking more like a dream.

And with each loss, Green started growing more and more resentful towards Red. Though Green knows that they both are basically racing for the title, Green couldn’t push aside the thought that Red is actually better at Pokemon battling than Green could ever be.

Yet not letting it get to him, Green painfully accepts each defeat and moves forward with his journey. He does comes across severe moments of self-doubt and periods of frustration, but he pushes forward. And within time, he achieves what he dreamt of achieving. Green tries his best not to cry but it’s real hard not to when he’s being named the new Pokemon League Champion of Kanto.

Green had fought against harsh obstacles that wanted to keep him away from this exact moment, but he pushed forward and won successfully.

He already anticipated the media covering his win for the champion title and his name being spread throughout the region, and hopefully throughout other regions.

_My soulmate. I did this for you. I will find you._

However his bask in glory didn’t last long as another obstacle just pushed through his doors seeking to rob away his moment.

_Red._

* * *

After losing the Champion title, Green ran straight home. He didn't let the tears, that he was struggling so hard to not spill since his loss, fall until he was sure that he was behind his bedroom door. After slamming his bedroom door behind him, he let all his pent up frustration of failure burn their trails down his face and escape his mouth in the form of loud, choked sobs.

Why did losing the title hurt this much?

Was it because of the person he lost it to?

No.

 _Maybe_.

Green honestly believed that there would still be a chance to stand by his childhood friend’s side and rebuild their friendship that took some damage during this journey. Yet this loss proved that that was just naive thinking. Because Green felt like he was betrayed by the one he cared most about. Because this was his chance to use the title to spread his name throughout the world. Hopefully, that someone, somewhere, would recognize Green as their soulmate.

Losing track of time, he snapped out of his wrecked state when he heard someone enter his room. Of all people, the last person he wanted to see was standing in the middle of his room. Not knowing what to say, he threw a punch. Then he unleashed his anger through the form of poison laced words. Green threw them like daggers at the new Champion, hoping they pierce through his heart and hurt in the same way Green was currently hurting.

"I fucking HATE you. GET THE FUCK OUT." Green spat.

Seeing through a veil of red, Green watched the startled Champion run out of the room.

And that was the last time he saw Red.

* * *

"The gym is yours. Do the Pokémon League proud." Lance said as he handed the keys to the Viridian Gym to Green.

Green stood in front of the gym and stared at it. He finally found a purpose to stop sulking around after his loss months ago. The wound of defeat is still very much fresh but he's learning how to accept it so he can move on - at least.

And Green had to owe it to Leaf.

One day she just barged in his room, dragged him outside - partially by his hair - and scolded him for isolating himself to the walls of his darken room for a whole month. After that day, and an earful of Leaf lecturing Green of neglecting his - physical and mental - health, Green slowly began trying to reinstate himself to life.

To the outside world.

After spending an entire month locked inside, he sort of feels relieved to feel the sunlight on his skin. Leaf was even horrified to see how thin and pale he gotten. She went to the extent of visiting him on a regular basis to keep up on his well-being and just to have a friend by his side.

He still cursed Red's name from time to time, but Leaf would cut in and nag about accepting defeat and learning to move on. Even though Green knew Leaf was right - she took pride in reminding him that she always was - he couldn't help but feel that losing the title isn't why he's angry at Red.

No, his anger towards Red runs deeper than just the loss of the title. Red had known why Green wanted to win the title yet Red didn’t hesitate to steal the opportunity away from Green. Childhood friend or not, Green feels like he can’t forgive Red for doing so. And the next time he sees Red, Green would be in the mood to push him off the edge of a mountain than congratulating him for winning the title.

But then there’s a part of Green that can’t stay mad at Red. A part of him wants to build some courage to go and visit Red. Suck in his pride to at least talk with Red, hopefully receive an apology and see if it’s possible to rebuild their friendship. Cause even though Green wants to deny it, he did miss Red.

A month after Green started living outside his room again, Leaf finally told him about Red’s disappearance.

He abandoned the Champion title and disappeared.

No one knows where he went and how people have been searching for him since.

After hearing the news, something inside Green broke.

He was flushed with a wave of anger.

Anger towards Red.

Why would Red run away?

He got what he wanted but decided it wasn't enough?

Why would he leave?

_Why would he leave me here?_

The last thought shocked Green and his anger was replaced with a sudden touch of sadness.

_Why would he care if he left me?_

He decided to visit the Pokémon League and found that they reinstated Lance as the Champion.

He asked for Red.

"Nobody knows where he ran off to. We just found a note saying how he relinquishes the title. Nothing else." Lance explained.

Green was stunned. Why would Red just give up the title?

_Why steal something from me just to give it up?_

"Green, now that you're here. I wanted to inform you of something…" Lance began.

Lance went on to explain that since the Viridian City Gym was vacant and in need of a new leader, the Pokémon League had considered Green for the spot. Green considered it for a few moments before accepting the position. Six months after becoming gym leader, and weeks and weeks of constant battling with trainers, Green never stop thinking about Red. The anger he had originally held against Red was slowly fading with time and slowly replacing itself with eagerness to see his face one more time.

It's been a year since Red's disappearance and Green had started to wonder if Red was ever going to return home - or worst, dead somewhere. The thought of not being able to see Red's face again tugged Green’s heart. If Green had known that that night - when he lost - would've been the last time he saw Red, Green would've reacted differently.

_Dear Arceus, I know I should have reacted differently._

But the lost cut deep.

His loss blinded him with rage and it led him to do the biggest regret of his life.

Green needs to see him again.

Green needs to find Red.

* * *

"Do you think Red is still alive?"

Green looked away from his the menu to glance at Leaf, who was staring at her coffee cup in her hands.

"Dunno." Green tried replying casually, as if the thought hadn’t crossed his mind a billion times before.

Leaf had taken a break from her adventures in Hoenn and decided to return to Kanto to visit Green for the week. It was a Saturday morning and they had decided to get breakfast at a nearby café before she had to take a plane back to Hoenn.

"It's been three years, Green. And still no word of him."

Green thought back to when he last saw Red; in his bedroom, the night of the Championship battle, a little more of three years ago.

He remembered the anger that boiled through his veins.

He remembered his fist connecting with Red's face.

He remembered the words that made Red flinched into the night and out of Green’s life.

Green tried looking for Red but before he could start, his gym leader duties got in the way. Since he was new he was tied down to one spot, as he was trying to get used to the gym leader position, and he couldn’t do anything about it. Then later on when Green thought he could finally start his search for Red, his gym duties just grew more and more. Overtime, he slowly lost his focus on looking for Red. And after years, his work made him stop thinking of Red completely.

Yet something inside of Green refused to let go of Red.

Green had felt guilty once realizing he had abandoned his quest to find Red. And he’d been debating whether he should just leave Red in the past and start looking forward his future.

A future without Red.

While it seemed promising and less worrisome, this tiny voice disagreed with that decision so Green has been going ‘round in circles wondering if Red is actually worth all this trouble.

Like as if his head is saying no.

While his heart is screaming _yes_.

Right now he's lucky to have the tiniest break from his job and relax, especially with Leaf in town. But with Leaf, he knows that she'll bring up the past. Because unlike Green, Leaf never forgot about Red.

"Have you still been looking for him?" Leaf asked.

"Maybe. But now I’m busy. Anyways, why do I have to look for him? That bastard chose to run away. If he cared about us, he’d come back on his own not the other way around." Green replied grumpily.

Even though Green did want Red to return, some part of him was still angry at Red for leaving so abruptly and never coming back after all these years.

"But he's your best friend. Ever thi-"

"WAS my best friend. Not anymore." Green interrupted.

 _Lies_.

Green still treasured Red as a friend, even after everything that happened between them. Though he wasn’t going to let Leaf know that.

"Ha. Lies." Leaf smiled. "He was always someone you deeply cared for. Some might even call it _love_."

Green spat the coffee he was drinking and stared at Leaf, shocked.

_What the-_

"Wh-what are you ta-talking about?" Green tried his best not to stutter but failed horribly.

"Oh, nothing." Leaf smiling before drinking her own coffee. "Just that I find it funny how you've denied your true feelings towards him."

"What tru-" Green began before he was interrupted.

"You _love_ him." Leaf said before continuing.

"And he loves you."

Green just stared at Leaf desperately trying to come up with an argument to her words, but he found himself questioning them instead.

Feelings towards Red? Is that the type of feelings he has towards Red? Is there truth to that accusation?

_Red loves me?_

"You’re an idiot for not being able to see it but-" Leaf took a sip of her coffee before finishing.

"I know it's true. And you do too."

Now Leaf stared at Green with a smile. He observed the sincerity in her smile and eyes. As if she was telling the truth and knew all along, and on top of that she was happy for them. And would be happier if they actually did something about it.

Before Green could say anything, a honk interrupted his chance and they both whipped their heads to find a taxi parked in front of the cafe.

"Well, my taxi is here." Leaf stated as she stood up.

Green stood up as well and he was embrace with a hug, that he wish could've lasted longer but Leaf was on a tight schedule. As Leaf was entering the taxi, she stopped midway, looked at Green and said her last words before driving off.

"Go find him."

* * *

" _You love him."_

_"And he loves you."_

Green kept replaying Leaf's words that night.

_Do I love Red?_

_Is that what I felt when I was around him?_

_Love?_

Green is aware of how close he was with Red and would have done anything for Red. Through years of teasing one another, snarky remarks, fighting about the smallest thing to making up the following day - their friendship seemed pretty tight. He would tell himself that that’s what best friends go through from years of being together, yet something else argued that it was deeper than just a strong friendship.

Green never understood the mysterious emotion that flushed through him whenever he was close to Red.

How Green would sometimes tell himself that the sun can’t be the brightest star in the Solar System when he would stare at the stars that burned brighter in Red’s crimson eyes.

Or how a glimpse of Red’s smile - especially those caused by Green - would make Green feel like he had something floating around in his chest.

Or the slightest touch from Red would feel so electric upon contact that it would be able to fry Green’s way of thinking for seconds, or minutes, or sometimes the rest of the day.

_Is this love?_

This feeling as if their lives are entwined in a way where they're meant to be together.

_Love…_

This feeling as if their fates are mended to fit perfectly together like a piece to a puzzle.

_Is it?_

This feeling of complete emptiness that he’s felt for the past years after losing the one person he deeply cared for.

_It is…_

Green can’t deny it any longer.

_Love…_

The rich, sweet sensation that’s clouded Green’s senses each time Red would look only at him.

_Red…_

Warm crimson eyes that only looked at Green in a way Red would never look at someone else.

_I love him…_

And the way deep emerald eyes would look at Red in a way Green would never look at anyone but Red.

_I love Red._

* * *

“Why don’t you go bother someone else?”

“Because, there’s no one else to bother.” Gold exclaimed.

A few months back, a Pokemon trainer had challenged the Viridian gym. He easily wiped through Green’s Pokemon team and won the last badge to qualify for the Kanto Pokemon League. Green had thought that that would’ve been the last time he’d see the trainer, however the golden eyed trainer somehow made it a routine to drop by Green’s gym to bother him for Pokemon battle tips against the Elite Four and the Champion.

A first, Green was irritated by the amount of time the trainer would waste - especially Green’s - annoying him, which would lead Green to threaten the trainer to leave him alone. Persistent, and unfazed by Green’s threats, Gold continued with his _whining_ for battle advice until Green cracked and decided to help him with some battling techniques and advice. With passing time, Green began to tolerant Gold’s excessive talkative nature and sometimes even looked forward Gold’s visits, since settling for a career as a gym leader can be stressful and sometimes extremely lonely.

With Leaf across seas in another region and his search for Red still lacking any progress, Green had never felt as lonely in his life as he does now. His Pokemon does ease some of the emptiness in his heart, however they can’t manage to fill enough of the empty voids to prevent the thoughts of Green dying alone. As if it’s the universe’s way of saying that Green deserves this fate for the way he treated everyone around him with selfishness and greediness. And also because Green is an absolute asshole.

“Asshole.”

“C’mon Green! Don’t be like that.” Gold pouted.

“Gold, why are you even here? Don’t you have duties as Champion to do?”

A few weeks ago, Gold managed to defeat Lance and become the new Kanto Pokemon League Champion. First thing Gold did was run all the way to Green’s apartment, banged the door at three o’clock in the morning and spilled the exciting news to an _very_ irritated half asleep Green. However, Gold still bothered to drop by the gym and bother Green. And with the Pokemon League not too far from Viridian City, Gold’s visits were frequent.

“I do but it’s extremely boring and draining. I barely have any time to do what I wanna do so I’m here instead.” Gold whined.

“Well I wish you weren’t. Leave.”

“Green.” Gold stretched out his name in a high pitch whiny voice. “C’mon. How about a battle?”

“No.”

“C’mon. I promise I’ll go easy on you.” Gold winked.

“Fuck off.”

“Please, I’m dying of boredom.” Gold continued to whine.

“For fucksake Gold. Is there anywhere else you can be at but HERE?” Green barked his frustration.

Green didn’t have time for this. He didn’t have time to be wasting with a kid that already has the world in his hands when he could be using this valuable time to continue his search for Red. But maybe Green’s frustration towards Gold might have been a bit overboard, since he noticed how hard Gold flinched to Green’s harsh tone and watched a layer of sadness wash over the young trainer’s face.

“Fine.” Gold choked out. “If you want me gone, fine. I’ll leave. I just.. I just wanted to give you company since I’ve noticed how lonely you’ve been.”

“I’m n-”

“Yes you are.” Gold interrupted Green. “I’m not stupid. But if you want me gone, then fine. I’ll leave. Anyways, I need to head out to Mt. Silver. There’s been rumors of something strange happening at the peak of the mountain and the league wants me to check it out.”

Gold started walking towards the front door of Green’s apartment before stopping, with one hand gripping the doorknob, and looked over his shoulder.

“Green, maybe you should go back home. Go visit your grandfather. As Champion, I’ll grant you a break from the gym. Go and clear your head.”

And with those last words, Gold walked out the apartment and left.

And Green just watched him.

Just like how he watched Red leave all those years ago.

With a heavy sigh, Green retreated into his room, pulled out a small suitcase, and began to fill it with clothes, some personal hygiene items and some work papers, just in case he has the urge to continue on his work. After finishing packing, Green laid in bed and began to wonder why someone always walks out of his life.

_It’s possibly because I’m stubborn and too much to handle._

Thought it’s not like Green was always like this. There was a time where he wore his heart on his sleeve and spoke nothing but kindness towards others. However, at the time, he was just a small boy with big dreams and the privilege of having the world on his fingertips. He could’ve dreamt of becoming anything and through the power of his family’s name, he would’ve most likely achieved it.

Though that young naive state of mind didn’t last when his parents decided to leave him with his grandfather. Though he was too young to fully understand why, he held to the hope that one day they would come back for him. However, as Green grew older and older, he began to realize that it was never his parents’ intention to return for him. They literally abandoned him with his grandfather, who he hardly knew at the time, and walked out of his life, never looking back.

With that realization, Green’s gentle way of thinking was replaced with anger and selfishness.

He was angry at his parents for leaving him in a small town with no place to go.

He was angry at his grandfather for allowing them to disappear from their lives.

But most importantly, he was angry at himself for not being able to love them hard enough so they wouldn’t leave.

And as a result, Green decided to close himself from ever loving someone else.

He was abandoned by the people he loved at a place he didn’t recognized as home.

He was so determined to not let anyone near his heart again yet one person was able to.

Green never planned to open up to anyone else ever again.

He also never planned to fall in love with that anyone else.

Yet a stupid title came between the two and ruined everything.

Green was left alone just like he was before he met Red.

But he’s willing to make things right again.

Because he wants back the most important person - in the world - to him.

He just needs more time.

_I am going to find you Red. Just wait for me._

* * *

“Green.” the soft whisper was heard as Green was pulled into a soft but tight embrace.

The hug lingered for a few moments before Green decided to pull away to properly look at the man who raised him, yet neglected to keep in contact with for the past few years.

“Gramps. It’s good to see you again.” Green softly whispered before pulling his grandfather in for another hug. Yet this time, it lingered for a bit longer.

Green informed his grandfather that he planned to stay for a week, before returning back to Viridian, and he caught a glimpse of a warm smile place itself on his grandfather’s face when he announced his stay.

Throughout the week, the two had spent it with each other catching up with one another’s lives, discussing their busy work lives, retelling old fond memories and working together in his grandfather’s lab whenever Green offered assistance.

With each passing day, Green slowly showed a softer side of himself to his grandfather. He tried dropping his snarky confident persona and instead replaced it with a more mature, and gentler side that Green had always tried to hide from everyone.

Thinking back, Green can admit that he failed himself as a grandson.

He kept his sweet old grandfather at a arm length distance from himself, fearing that if he kept him any closer his grandfather would suddenly leave him just like Green’s parents and therefore repeat a heartbreaking cycle that he spent years avoiding to repeat.

He was never able to fully show how much he deeply cared for his grandfather because of his fear of abandonment that his parents had embedded inside him.

Even so, Green wants to believe that, his grandfather understood his fear and space in between them throughout all these years of distance and coldness.

But that’s why Green is here, to make amends.

To finally open up to the man who raised him when his own parents decided not to.

Yes, his grandfather sometimes lost himself in his work and sometimes wasn’t there for Green but he still cared.

He tried his best to be there for Green, yet Green kept him at a distance away.

But now, he doesn’t want to.

“I love you gramps.” Green softly whispered to his grandfather on the last night of his visit. “I- I just wanted you to know that.”

Warm wrinkled hands place themselves on top of Green’s hands before gripping them in a comforting embrace.

“You know that I do, Green. You know I do.” his grandfather assured him.

And with that, Green finally let himself cry in front of his grandfather for the first time since he began living with the man. He tried so hard to never expose his weak side to anyone, but with emotions at a peak it was impossible not to break down.

Pulled into a tight embrace, he spent moments letting out years and years of pent up frustrations and worries that’s plagued Green for years.

Like will he had ever find his soulmate?

Why didn’t his parents love him enough to stay with him?

Or better yet, will he ever see Red again?

Green had already declared lost hope on finding his soulmate. He remembered how he had planned using the Champion title as a way to see if his soulmate will talk about him, however that opportunity was lost.

But maybe Green never had a soulmate to look for from the beginning.

Maybe Green was born to die alone.

He had just wasted years worrying for someone who doesn’t exist and in the process of doing everything possible to find a stranger he had no connection with, he lost his best friend.

No, he lost the one he loved.

And since then, he’s been so alone.

“I had felt so alone.” Green confessed. “I didn’t know what to do or what I wanted.”

“Green…”

“But now I do, Gramps. I think I’m in love but I feel like it’s too late now.” Green sobbed.

“And why do you think that?”

“Because…” Green paused.

_Should I tell him? Should I confess that his grandson is in love with his best friend? Who is a guy._

Taking a few moments to think it over, Green swallowed hard.

“Because he’s gone.”

Silence took over the once emotional atmosphere before being broken by a low whisper.

“Who’s gone?”

“Red. Gramps. Red. I love Red.”

Finally saying it out loud, and no less confessing it to his grandfather, a flood of fresh tears started running down his face and Green was a sobbing mess yet again.

It took years for Green to finally realize this fact, and it took awhile to finally say it out loud for him to hear but he’s been afraid what others would think about it.

Leaf knew this fact before he did, and she didn’t seemed fazed by it but eager to finally see her closest friends finally do something about their feelings towards one another.

But since reconciling with his grandfather, he was hesitant to tell him. Scared that his grandfather would reject him and scold him for thinking such unnatural thoughts.

Green just couldn’t bear to lose someone else.

Preparing himself for the worst, he was shocked to find himself pulled into a bone crushing hug.

He was also taken back a bit to know that his grandfather had this kind of strength left in him for an old man.

“Green, my boy.” his grandfather softly whispered.

Pulling back from the hug, Green looked at his grandfather and was startled to see tears in the old man’s eyes.

“Gramps…”

“Green, you’re my grandson. I love you more than you can imagine. The first day when your parents had left you with me, I had swore to myself that I would love you endlessly and provide you with everything your parents failed to provide you with.

Obviously, their absence affected you deeply and I gave you your space but I never stop loving you. And even now, I still love you. Who you love does not matter to me. Man or woman, if that person brings my grandson happiness and are willing to stand by you, even through dark times, then I have no reason to oppose.” Green’s grandfather smiled softly.

Absorbing all the words his grandfather said, a tension that gripped Green’s heart was suddenly eased and Green continue to sob uncontrollably after hearing his grandfather’s love and acceptance towards him.

“And I’m beyond happy to know that the one who has my grandson’s heart is one who I deeply trust.”

“Thank you gramps.”

_Thank you._

* * *

_Why am I here?_

It was the afternoon and Green currently stood in front of a two-story white house, that he’d probably spent half his childhood running through its hallways. He doesn’t know how he managed to summon the courage to walk up the porch steps, but now he was losing his nerve just frozen in place in front of the, intimidating, red door after quietly knocking the door.

What felt like seconds of waiting for a response felt like an eternity to Green.

_I shouldn’t be here._

Green kept repeating the same sentence in his mind and he felt so uncomfortable to be appearing out of the blue to be visiting his old friend’s home.

_Well, not out of the blue entirely. Gramps’ house is just down the road but still…_

He was just moments away from turning away from the door, hopping onto his Pidgeot and flying back home but he was stopped from doing so when the doorknob started turning slowly.

One moment he was mindlessly lost in thought whether he should just leave, but then the next moment he was staring at a woman, who had become so much as a mother figure to him after so many years of being cared by her, standing in front of him with wide eyes.

Unable to move or form any kind of words, he just stood in place and stared at the woman. Green noted all the small changes in the woman’s features that’s changed since the last time he saw her years ago. Like the dullness in her brown eyes that replaced the light that used to radiate within them. Or the small wrinkles that make themselves known on the corners of her mouth if she smiled or frown. Or the fact that Green now towered over her, unlike years ago when she would look down at him with the brightest smile beaming at him.

Yet she still looked the same. Her hair color almost matching his own but slightly a darker shade. Could almost mistake her for his own mother.

_Well, she is like the mother I never had._

Lost in thought, yet again, Green failed to register the soft smile that appeared on her small delicate face and the next thing he knew, he was pulled into a tight embrace.

Green wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but he wasn’t expecting this. He expected yelling, cursing, ranting, resentment, anger, or anything else but this. He convinced himself that it was his fault that her son disappeared without a trace or a goodbye. But the woman, one who he can refer to as a mother, was embracing him as if she actually missed him.

With so many things going through Green head, he finally acknowledged the small warmth he was embraced in and pulled himself out of those thoughts to wrap both his arms around her.

“Green. Welcome back.”

“Yeah.. It’s good to be back.”

“Come in. Sit in the living room while I make us some tea.” she said as she disappeared into the kitchen.

Green made his way towards the living room and was hit with a wave of nostalgia. He looked around and everything seemed the same as it did the last time he step foot in this house. Trying to remember his last visit, it must’ve been some time before he and Red started their Pokemon journeys.

_Possibly when I declared him as my rival._

Nothing could push away the sudden bloom of regret that grew in Green’s chest after recollecting old memories of Red.

Especially memories where he seemed so cruel towards Red.

_We were so close before I became so selfish._

Green snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a soft cough from behind him. He whipped his head towards the source and saw his host, standing by the doorway with a cup of tea on each hand, smiling at him softly. They spent the next hour or so catching up with each other’s lives, keeping in mind that Green’s visit was timely limited since he planned to return back to Viridian before dusk.

As expected, Green learned that Red has made no attempt to make contact to his mother since he disappeared. She reassured Green that she was fine, that maybe Red got busy with his life. But Green couldn’t fail to notice the layer of sadness that dulled her eyes when she spoke of Red.

_When I find you, I’m going to drag your ass back here._

There were a few gaps of comfortable silence in between conversations of various of topics and by the time Green caught a glimpse outside, he noticed that the sun was about to touch the horizon.

Wrapping up their conversation and making promises for future visits, Green stood up to walk towards the front door. However, a quick side glance to a picture frame on a bookshelf in the corner of the room caught Green’s attention. Quickly moving towards the object, Green slowly grabbed the frame and stared at a picture of two boys entangled with one another while sound asleep.

“That was Red’s favorite picture of you both.” Green heard a soft voice from behind him.

Green barely caught what was said from the woman behind him since he was too lost in thoughts.

“When was this taken?” the only thought Green was able to ask out loud about the picture.

“Hmm. I believe it was around a year before you both had started your journeys. I remember going over to your grandfather’s house to pick Red up from the sleepover you both had the night before and that’s how I found you both - on the floor cuddled on top of a pile of blankets and pillows. I just had to capture the moment. Too adorable not to. Red even seemed happy to have a picture of the moment.”

Combing back in time, Green remembered all the countless nights he spent with Red having one sided conversations and making promises that were never kept.

“I remember waking up and finding myself alone on the floor. I thought he just decided to get up and leave but if you came to pick him up, then I don’t have to hold that against him anymore.

Anyways, I don’t blame him. I bet he was tired of me. I literally kept him up all night just talking to him about the Pokemon journey we were going to go off on and whining to him about the soulmate that didn’t care about me. I mean- well, it doesn’t matter now.

I spent so many years complaining to Red about not having a soulmate and now I realize that I don’t care anymore. Red was always there for me. I think that was enough for me. If only I had realized it back then. Maybe he would still be here.”

And it’s true, if Green had realized his feelings towards Red sooner then all this searching for Red wouldn’t be necessary. Because Green wouldn’t have pushed away Red for losing a title that wouldn’t have meant nothing towards Green.

Breathing deeply after his sudden rambling, Green placed the picture frame back to its placement on the bookshelf. He then turned around to bid farewell to the woman but he was stopped by a look of confusion on the woman’s face.

“Uh what’s wrong?” Green asked.

The woman spent a moment staring at him as if Green just announced that he isn’t really Green, but another version of Green from a parallel universe where his name is different yet the world is the same. Before he could repeat his question, a look of realization swept over her face and she let out a small breath before speaking.

“You don’t know?”

Now it was Green’s turn to look confused.

_What?_

“Don’t know what?” Green thought out loud.

“Oh.” was all she said before looking away with a mixture of desperation and guilt displaying on her face.

After a few moments of thinking to herself she finally seemed to have made up her mind on what to say.

“I di- I had thought that that was the reason why Red had gone away but I guess I was mistaken.”

Green cocked his head backwards to her words.

“What re-”

“He’s your soulmate, Green.” she quickly said.

_What?_

“What?” Green repeated his thought.

“Soulmates. You’re both each other’s soulmates, Green.”

Soulmates.

 _Soulmate_.

The word had crossed Green’s thoughts repeatedly for years and years. Plagued with the constant wonder if he was ever going to meet his soulmate.

Always wondering who it was he was destined to fall in love with.

Always trying to picture the face of the person he was destined to fall in love with.

Always wondering what their name was to the face of the person he was destined to fall in love with.

He came to the conclusion that he didn’t have one and decided that he didn’t need one.

Since he was already in love.

But he never thought it would actually be with his soulmate.

There has to be a mistake.

Green continued to stare at her in shock, wondering if she’ll suddenly start laughing and admit that she’s joking with him.

Cause this has to be a joke.

A cruel joke.

“Ho-” Green choked on his word before clearing his throat.

“How do you know?”

“He was never really good at hiding things from me. I - accidentally - caught a few glimpses and I can’t imagine anybody else taunting him the way you did.” she smiled.

Green blushed at the comment and tried not to think of all the things he’s said about Red behind his back.

 _Shit_.

“Though he did eventually confide in me with who is soulmate was. And he was so happy about it. He made me promise not to say a word.” she confessed.

_But why..._

“Why didn’t he tell me?”

Green wanted an answer.

He needed to know why he was just hearing about this. If Red was happy, then why didn’t he tell Green? So many years of confiding in Red about the fear of being without a soulmate yet Red knew all along. But why?

“That’s something you’re gonna have to ask him yourself.” she simply stated.

A look of sympathy crossed her face as she reached for his hands and squeeze them within her small hands.

“Please Green, find him and bring him back home. I know you’re the only one who can.”

Green stared down into her eyes and for once, saw a light of hope blossom within the layer of sadness that had coated the soft brown eyes for years.

Lightly squeezing her hands, he nodded, bidded farewell and flew back home.

* * *

_What now?_

Green needed sleep.

On his way back home, via Pidgeot, Green felt like crap. He was emotionally exhausted from the week he had spent back at his hometown. With reconciling with his grandfather, confessing his true feelings towards his childhood friend, and finding out - somehow the universe’s way of clearly fucking with Green - that his childhood friend is, in fact, the soulmate he’s spent so long waiting for, Green needed sleep.

But overall, Green needs to see Red.

He needs to be able to face him, and touch him, and _kiss him_.

_And I need to slap the shit out of him for making me go through all this shit._

But most of all, Green needs to apologize. Apologize for treating Red the way that he did for a pointless title, that Green now realizes he doesn’t care for at all, and for pushing him away when, Green could assume, Red was just trying to reach out. That if Green could rewind time, he wouldn’t hesitate to go back in time and do all the right things. Say all the right things.

Cause clearly, Green has been saying all the wrong things.

But with no clue with where Red could be hiding, Green was stuck with all these unsaid apologizes and feelings. Exploring through most of the region’s landmarks and finding no sign of Red, Green’s faith in finding him was starting to decrease.

_Am I chasing a ghost?_

Once inside the comfort of his cozy bedroom, he let himself fall on top of his bed, not even bothering to cover himself with the sheets, and let himself fall into a deep sleep.

Or so he wish he could.

Green was rudely awaken to someone loudly banging against his apartment door. He tried ignoring it, hoping that they’d assume he isn’t home and leave. But he should’ve have known that persistent people existed on this planet. Especially, specific annoying golden-eyed persistent brats.

“GREEN.”

Green wanted to die.

“I know you’re here. I just saw you fly back.”

Green wish that for once - _for once_ \- Gold could understand that sometimes, or most of the time, Green can’t tolerate his anxious voice. Especially after just getting back home, exhausted, after learning that his soulmate is someone he had regrettably pushed away years ago without ever knowing. But aside from being annoying, Gold can’t read minds.

“Green! It’s important! I swear. OPEN UP.”

Knowing Gold isn’t going to go away, sighing heavily, Green climbs out of bed and opens the door with the nastiest glare.

“Aw Green, it’s good to see you too.” Gold greets Green with the most innocent smile.

Green wishes he could punch off that smile off the asshole’s face.

But he doesn’t.

“What the fuck do you want Gold?” Green growled.

* * *

There was snow everywhere.

From the right to the left, up and down, just layers and layers of white-like frozen powder.

Bracing himself through the cold, harsh wind, Green trekked towards the top of the enormous mountain. He had intended to ride on top of Pidgeot to the peak, but the vicious winds surrounding the mountain quickly squashed that plan.

“Of all places.” Green whispered to himself.

Ever since hearing about Gold’s battle with a powerful trainer on top of the mountain, Green had no doubt that Gold had battle Red.

_Who else would be idiotic to runaway to the most insufferable place in the region?_

“Actually, I’m the idiot for not even considering this place before.”

And it’s true. Of all places, throughout the region, this mountain didn’t even cross Green’s mind as a possible hideaway for Red. And Green has been berating himself since.

Taking a few breaks of climbing and sometimes calling out Arcanine for short distance back rides, and to warm himself from the cold, Green managed to reach a small cave near the peak of the mountain. Upon seeing the cave from the distance, Green broke into a full sprint towards it. Cautious, he stopped before the entrance and asked Arcanine to scout the cave for any danger.

Once getting a confirmation that the cave was empty, Green began searching the cave for any sign of an occupant. A quick scan of the cave proved that someone does, or at least did, indeed take shelter in here. A pile of burnt wood, and leftover ashes, was found in the center of the cave. And observing the various shades of scorch marks burnt into the floor of the cave, Green concluded that whoever lived here must have for a long time now.

Finding small berries, empty potion bottles and various other items, someone indeed still lived here. Upon observing a bundle of blankets nested in the corner of the cave, he uncovered a familiar looking backpack from underneath the blankets.

Red’s backpack.

Quickly grabbing it, Green observed it closely and confirmed that it was Red’s.

Searching through the backpack, he found a wore out Pokedex that seemed as it hasn’t been used in years. Trying to turn it on proved fruitless but Green didn’t have to to figure out whose Pokedex it belonged to. Flipping over the device, he traced the writing that was carved into the back side of the electronic.

 _Property of Pokemon Trainer Red_.

Green reread the scripture to himself various times until he finally grasped the realization he been trying to process.

_He’s here._

And Green could feel tears already building up in his eyes.

After so many years of being apart.

Years of cursing his name before yearning for his face.

Green feels like he’s one step away from Red.

Just one step.

 _Please be here_.

Excitement suddenly rushing throughout his body, Green couldn’t bear to wait another second waiting for Red to return to the cave.

He needed to find him.

Placing the backpack underneath the blankets, Green was about to rush out of the cave for his search for Red but several small red spheres rolled off the top of the blankets. Assuming they were more berries, Green picked them up and was about to place them back on top of the blanket when he observed them more closely.

 _Pokeballs_?

Green stared at them for a few moments before glancing outside at the vicious winds slapping against the entrance of the cave.

Then it clicked.

_THIS MORON WENT OUT IN THIS WEATHER ALONE?!_

Shocked and panicking at the thought of Red wandering around in this kind of weather, vulnerable, Green ran out the cave into the cold. Noticing that the sky was beginning to darken and the winds got harsher than they were earlier, Green felt like he switched to full panic mode.

_This isn’t good. Fuck._

Against the idea of calling out his Pokemon in this type of weather, he had no choice.

“ARCANINE! EEVEE! PIDGEOT! COME ALL OUT.”

His trusted Pokemon virtualized themselves in front of him and braced themselves against the strong winds.

“GUYS! I NEED YOUR HELP!” Green screamed through the loud howling of the winds.

After giving instructions to his Pokemon, all four separated in different directions looking for the trainer with red eyes.

Fighting against the cold, Green was desperately searching throughout the nearby area hoping to catch any sign, or at least anything pointing Green to the direction, of Red. At first, he was frantically running through the mountain but the wind forced Green to slow down his pace to fast walking.

Without a specific destination as to where he was going, Green was nearing the edge of the mountain when he spotted the shape of something or someone, from the distance, standing right at the edge of the mountain. With the wind blowing snow everywhere, it seemed like Green was walking through a rough fog of snow and it made anything from the distance hard to see. However as Green got closer to the figure he could see the slightest hint of the color red.

_Could that be…_

Desperately wishing against the thought, as the figure was standing way too close to the edge of the mountain, Green began walking faster towards the shape. Closer and closer, the figure started becoming clearer and clearer. And-

Oh.

_Oh._

Green couldn’t stop himself from smiling. He couldn’t remember the last time he smile so hard. And he could already feel the tears building up again in the corner of his eyes.

Standing in the distance, with his back facing Green, was the reason why Green risked his life to climb this torturous mountain.

Why nothing in Green’s life ever turned out the way Green had dreamt.

Why Green suffered years of loneliness without this person in his life.

Why Green had felt incomplete without this person.

And now this person, after years of separation, was standing a few feet away from Green.

“Red.”

He whispers sweet promises for Red to hear but the wind swallows them instead, but he doesn’t care because he knows they’ll being written on his beloved’s skin to see.

There’s so many things Green wants to say to Red.

But right now, those things can wait.

Because right now Green wants to hold the hands, and stare into the eyes, of his soulmate and say the three words Green has been dying to say his whole life.

_I found you._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading. :) hope y'all enjoyed this chapter.
> 
> Next chapter is the last chapter and it'll be like a short epilogue.


	3. saying it over and over and over again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO sorry for taking so long to post this tiny chapter. My priorities, unexpectedly, were forced to be rearranged and sadly this fic was the one thing I was unable to make time for. 
> 
> But hey, final chapter. :)

Sometimes they can’t help remembering the last few years.

Or they can’t help wondering how different those years could’ve been if they had done things differently.

Years of silence from one another.

Years of clashing feelings towards one another.

All because they couldn’t find the right way to say how they felt towards one another.

It’s been a few months since Green found Red and brought him back home.

Back to the people that Red abandoned because he was too much of a coward to tell the one he loved the truth from the beginning.

From tears, to tight grip embraces, to harsh scolding - from a very emotional Leaf - Green felt like he could finally breathe for the first time in years as he watched Red being reunited with the ones who loved them both.

Green finally felt like he found the missing piece that he desperately searched for his entire life - finally making him feel whole.

But even though Green now falls asleep wrapped in Red’s arms each night, he can’t help but feel like he’ll open his eyes the following morning and find that Red disappeared again.

Gone because maybe Green said something he wasn’t supposed to say.

Or gone because Green was too weak to keep a tight grip on Red.

He wants to push that fear aside but his mind just loves to replay the idea over and over and over again.

So Red loves to let Green know how much he loves him over and over and over again - in his own way.

Knowing the reality that he will never be able to voice his love towards Green and watch that love paint itself onto his soulmate’s skin, Red decided to use an alternative. Each morning - since Green had nervously asked Red to move in with him - Green has woke up to different writings on his arms.

**_You’re perfect._ **

**_Your eyes are beautiful._ **

**_Killer ass._ **

**_Can’t live without you._ **

**_You’re mine._ **

Sometimes it would be a single word, or other times it would be a variety of phrases, scribbled in messy handwriting with the use of pen or marker differing each morning.

But nonetheless, Green would cherish each word, each mark and wore them all day.

And on the morning of Green’s 18th birthday, it was no different.

Wanting a vacation away from Kanto and also somewhere to celebrate Green’s birthday, they decided to escape to Alola. Having heard about the unheard region - and it being famous for the warm tropical vibe that the region attracted tourists for -  from Professor Oak, they bought tickets for a ferry to the region and planned to stay for a week.

Since arriving at the region and booking a room at a cozy motel in Heahea City, they’d spent their time exploring the island, and the other nearby islands, together. They encountered new Pokemon that don’t live in Kanto, along with young trainers unknowingly seeking a battle with two former Champions, and natives who often shared words of wisdom and old stories about the history of the islands.

And on Green’s birthday, they decided to spend the day exploring Hau’oli City. They enjoyed their morning relaxing at the beach, spent their noon eating lunch at a nearby small cafe, walked around shopping for clothes - mostly Green as he wandered around while Red lazed around - in the shopping district all afternoon, before Red led Green to a fancy looking restaurant for dinner that evening.

With the day almost over, they decided to stroll down the beach one more time before they had to make their trip back to their motel in Heahea City for the night. The sun was already dipping below the horizon once they reached the beach, and they watched the day slowly fade away as the night gradually took over it’s place. They found a spot and decided to lay down on the beach as they watched the last remaining warm colors of the sun disappear, and watch the white glow of the moon dominate the night - along with the millions of stars that burn and twinkle bright.

Laying side by side, holding hands and lost in awe, Green quickly broke the moment by sitting up from his position and turned to face Red.

“Red. I want to show you something.”

As Red sat up from his position, Green was busy rolling up the sleeve to his dress shirt - that he had wore that evening for dinner - and exposed the clear smooth skin of his arm.

That’s what Red expected to see but he noticed black inked words that were written on his beloved’s skin.

**_I love you._ **

Then Red remembered that he had written those same words, on the same exact spot, on Green while he was sleeping that morning. Yet they somehow looked a bit bolder and bigger than he remembered writing them in with the small ballpoint pen he had used.

_Why are you showing me this? I already know. I wrote this._

Red was about to sign his thoughts but Green interrupted him before he could.

“I got it tattooed.”

_Wh- What?_

Red was stunned by Green’s words for a moment before pulling Green’s arm towards him to observe the words more closely, and noticed the slight redness surrounding each bold permanent letter - looking like it’d hurt if Red were to try to wipe it off to prove it’s authenticity.

_Green._

“I wanted something by you to live forever on my skin. Your words, specifically.”

Green continued speaking but Red was too lost in his thoughts to hear anything he was saying.

With that tattoo solidifying Green’s love towards Red, he couldn’t have felt happier in his entire life.

Tears started building in the corners of Red’s eyes as his thoughts were everywhere, but one phrase stood out from all the others.

_I love you._

And instead of signing it, for Green to know, he decided to show how he felt by pressing his lips against Green’s lips. Red channeled all his love, all his feelings, all his thoughts through a long passionate kiss.

The warmth that Red felt whenever he kissed Green always spread throughout his body like a disease.

There were mere seconds of separation of lips to refuel their lungs with oxygen before reconnecting and reigniting the fire that they fear they’d lose if left alone.

After what felt like hours of nonstop kissing, they parted away from each other’s faces but kept the tension alive as the heat from crimson fire eyes clashed alongside the heat of emerald forest eyes.

Red’s hand shifted a bit from the side of Green’s body to his hips, before it slowly started making it’s way towards Green’s thighs and squeezing it.

Green gasped softly and blushed lightly.

Sensing that Red was capable of escalating their current situation while disregarding where they were, and who were around, Green entangles his hand in Red’s and brings their conjoined hands to his mouth to lightly press a kiss against Red’s skin.

“Tonight.” Green whispers against Red’s hand.

“We can continue what we started. I promise.”

Sulking a bit, Red nods.

Green smiles at Red’s childish nature and leans forward to quickly press a kiss on Red’s lips before pulling him back down onto the ground so they can continue their stargazing.

With no colors in sight, the night sky glowed white and the two were softly bathed in light.

And with the ocean filling the air with the sound of waves crashing onto the shore before pulling back and then crashing again and pulling back and so and so in an endless cycle, Green felt like he was in a beautiful dream that he wish he’d never wake up from.

But the sting on Green’s arm happily reminds him that it isn’t a dream.

The day he spent with Red was real.

The last few months with Red were real.

The last few years without Red were painfully real as well.

Yet they’re here next to each other, side by side, hand in hand, staring into a sea of stars reflecting themselves onto their eyes.

And Green wishes that this moment would last forever.

How the atmosphere around them is so quiet yet so warm and comfortable.

How their hearts are beating for one another so close.

And he never wants to feel so far away from Red ever again.

Cause he intends to wake up to Red every morning until the day they can’t open their eyes.

Hold each other so tight as if they even loosen their grip on one another, they’d disappear.

Spend hours and hours just learning each other’s secrets and fears that they haven’t learned yet.

And retrace every inch of skin that’s already been explored yet feel as if it’s the first time they’ve touched each other in such a way.

There’s still some strain that their relationship needs to overcome and some words that need to be shared to one another.

But as long as they’re next to each other, they know they’ll get through them.

Cause their hands - a current tangled mess - won’t be letting go of each other anytime soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to thank you all for reading this little fic.  
> I've deeply appreciated all the love that this fic received.  
> Everyone who took the time on leaving a comment, thank you for making my heart flutter.  
> Whether by sharing your sweet enthusiasm towards this story or sharing your opinion, or advice, on how I could've done it better, thank you so much.
> 
> Not sure if there'll be another fic, even though I have some ideas, but thank you for giving this one a chance 'til the end.


End file.
